the state i am in a @pocketnovel

yowhatsthehaps:

In the relatively short amount of time that I have been on Tumblr, you may have noticed something about me. I am an idiot. My idiocy extends into many areas of my life, but I believe it is most prominent in my interactions with boys. Men, if you will.

You see, I have this problem. The problem is flirting. I do not understand it. I don’t know how to do it. I can’t tell when it is being done to me. If a boy is flirting with me, I just assume he is being very polite. It never occurs to me that anyone would ever be expressing interest in me. Honestly.

When I like a boy, I don’t flirt. When I try, I tend to go with the look-at-you-until-you-notice-me-looking-at-you-and-look-away-so-that-it-looks-like-I’m-ignoring-you method. Which is like, the shittiest method ever in time.

So, basically what needs to happen is that we need to go back to kickin’ it Cro-Magnon style. This means that if boys like me, they pretty much need to bash me on the head with a stick and say “ME LIKE YOU” and then I’ll be like, “OHHHHHH. ALRIGHT, COOL.” Then we can have makeouts. Come to think of it, even if you just told me that you wanted to make out with me, I would totally think you were joking. Because I’m an idiot.

There is no clear answer, here, friends. Because I’m an idiot.

Excuse me, miss?  Please stop plagiarizing from my BRAIN.  Thank you.

(Holy crap this is so me.)